3 Tips on how to cheat on your girlfriend.

I honestly do not know your motives and intentions but I will guide you on how to cheat on your partner without getting caught. For him only.

1. Make another John Doe persona.

     When you are cheating you can't give your mistress any personal information that may identify who you are and where you live which she might use to mess up the great situation you have going at home with the woman you are about to betray. Luckily, women are easily manipulated by simple lies. Form another person and use it only when you are with her. Strictly, adhere to your script and know how to return to your personality when you are with your partner.

2. Make a plan and schedule for both of them

   Men are awful in terms of memorizing numbers, details and ocassions. A simple way to eliminate this is to put all of your girlfriend’s special ocassions(her birthday, father’s birthday, anniversary and etc.) and the other girl’s special ocassions to an actual calendar or to a smartphone calendar. You can use codes that are unique to mark those dates.

     Endearments are sweet but it can be devastating. On the other hand, calling them by their name is also a devastating thing also because sometimes if you are used in texting so much to someone you can call them accidentaly by other names. Thus, using endearments that are same will eliminate this threat.

     If you are using a smartphone to contact both of them, for God’s sake do not use a dual sim smartphone(each sim slot for a specific girl). It will just cause chaos, confusion and potential erroneous sending of message. And if you are using two phones make sure you use the nicest phone that you have and hide the other one if you are with one of them to avoid suspicion of having a backup phone for cheating.

     Ask your girlfriend about her schedule without raising a red flag. You can do this by ocassionally asking about her work and why is she so stressed/lax, openning up about your work in hopes for her to open up also or by observing the daily pattern of work/schedules. This way you can schedule when to bang the other girl.

3. Covering it up

     No lies are permanent. If your girlfriend is getting doubtful of you, the greatest course of action is to get even more doubtful of her. If she questions your whereabouts, question hers. Monitor her phone calls. Hire a gumshoe to track her every move. Install a key logger on her computer. Implant a GPS chip into her skin while she sleeps. Get a stool sample tested. Forbid her to see friends, loved ones and retail employees. By becoming wildly suspicious of her, you're showing her that you are committed to fidelity and could never cheat.

     At some point you will be caught red handed and it will mean break up or forget and move on type of drama. However , using the said techniques above, you can extend your cheating spree duration for as long as you want. Happy Cheating Hypocrite!

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